What Will Schoey Do Next?

Posted by Car Magazine MotorPlay under Entertainment

The question isn’t `what will Schoey do next` but `what would you be willing to do for the huge amounts of money he’s being paid with?` And the answer to that, my friend, is almost anything that doesn’t involve large quantities of pig feces. Still, let’s not spoil the game and think about a few other things Schoey might do.

He might be paid to prevent a hijacked jet from taking off by driving around its wheels and tying them together just like Luke did in the first moments of The Empire Strikes Back. But wait, these films are about his partnership with Shell…

Well, he could get Lewis Hamilton to sit with him inside the petrol station and each time a customer comes in they would start fighting each other. I wouldn’t like that, as I think Hami wouldn’t stand a chance, but that would make a really nice hidden camera video.

Or, they could set up a mini-class room besides the counters with Schoey as the teacher and Kimi Raikkonen and Felipe Massa as the students. Of course, Schoey would get mad at Kimi’s total lack of response and some very nice things would come out of his mouth that will make you very sorry you’ve never studied German. Or at least German curse words…

These are a few things I think Schoey should do next. Maybe he should also sit at a table with a free chair in front of him and invite people to drink some engine oil with him. Or maybe hire him as a doorman, considering there are still some Shell stations without automatic doors. Or have him mop the floor. Or have him handing out toilet paper in the station’s toilets.

No, that’s just mean.